Friday, July 23, 2010

We are parents.

Last night my heart and I met on the floor in one big love puddle. Monkey had been asleep for a few hours when she woke up with that painful baby cry. Anthony went in and after a minute I realized it wasn't her painful cry it was her scared cry. She had had a bad dream..or something. I waited (secretly doing that mommy thing we sometimes do when someone else is trying to calm our crying baby...I, unconsciously, rocked as if I had her in my arms) while Ant tried to snuggle her and put her back to sleep but she wasn't having it. I got her a bottle (just like mommy, food makes it all better) and went in. I asked if he wanted me "to try" and he handed her over. He left the room as I scooted into the glider. She was calm. A weird mix of emotions came over me at that thoughts went something like this:

"Aw she calmed down as soon as she was in my arms..she wanted her mommy....I hope that doesn't upset Anthony..I can't believe she just wanted me..she really loves me and knows I am her mommy-her comforter and protector. I hope Anthony isn't upset."

There have been times when Ant could calm her and make her happy when I couldn't and it never bothered me because it makes me happy to see the bond they have..its amazing really..but if he were able to calm her more often than I could I think it would make me sad. I know he knows its because I am with her all day and, well, sometimes a baby just needs her mommy (trust me..he has used this phrase to his advantage plenty!) Its not like I didn't know this but when the moment happens, when you experience your baby just needing you to make things all better..its like you are realizing it for the first time. You are their world. You are a mom. You possess a power that no one else has.

So I scooted into the glider with Hayden snuggled into my body, clutching her blankie & sleepily drinking her bottle. My head was gently resting on hers as a breathed in her baby smell and thought about how amazing it is-the bond between a child and her parents. Then, without warning, she melted my heart. She effortlessly placed her tiny, warm hand on my arm and slowly rubbed up and down. As if to say "My mommy's here...everything's ok." It was the sweetest baby 'thank you' I have ever received. 

I am so thankful for the unbreakable bond that Anthony and I have with our baby. She is our greatest blessing and moments like this make all the whinings from the day dissapear and just allow us to be who we forever are--mama and dada.


  1. So incredibly sweet! Those are the moments we live for!

  2. What a beautiful and well written post. I sat here reading it and totally reflecting on my moments with my little girl and how much she loves me to be her comforter when she is upset as I am the one she is most around at this point. There is nothing more special than that feeling in all the world!